The past year has been a year of sifting, from career decisions to decisions about who I wanted in my corner. On looking back and reflecting, I can honestly say that the more I created a squad of people who loved to win, the more I excelled. Not only do they love to win, they are proactive at it. I realized that for the most part, I had been stuck on looking for mentors where all I needed was to build a ‘tribe’ (tribe is the cool word for friends in your corner) and some good older heads that I could count on for advice where I was needing some. We don’t realize how much the people with whom we choose to surround ourselves play such an impact on our lives either greatly or adversely. We don’t get to select what that influence is, we only get to select the people and whatever comes out of it, is left to the universe.

I took a critical look at the people in my life and had to decide on whether or not they were impacting my life in a positive or negative way. The older we get, the more narrow our priorities become and the more significant each one becomes. We no longer have anyone else to blame for our goals being accomplished besides ourselves, so we’re tougher on ourselves and equally tougher on those we care about.

I have come up with a list of reasons why your girl squad should matter and have listed them thus:

1. You are a sum total of the people you hang out with the most

If this doesn’t send goose bumps up your spine, I don’t know what does. If you take a close look at the people you choose to associate yourself with the most, they’re the ones with whom you choose to spend most of your leisure, identify them and figure out what your sum total is? Is it a positive figure or a negative? If you had to come to a conclusion about whether or not you will meet up your goals and deadlines based on these people, will it be a Yes or a No?

2. Time is of the essence

Time is so precious that it can’t be bought back once gone. How are you choosing to spend that time? What are the conversations centered around? Is it moving you forward or are you retreating backwards?

3. You need loyalty and well-intentioned people in your corner

Look back at the last time you went through a crisis, think back to the advice that you got, were they of any use to helping you solve the problem. Problem solvers are one thing but people who genuinely want to see you win are a whole other ball game. If you do not have a squad of your own, who are looking to see you win as much as they are themselves, what are you doing really?

4. Opportunities for learning abound

Where the people in your circle love to win, you will undoubtedly pick up a habit or two from them. This is a good thing as it will force you to gain some much discipline

5. It will push you

No better motivator than seeing your neighbor do better than you. It fuels your determination and if they could do it, then why can’t you.

As African parents would say, do they have two heads?

It gets some healthy competition brewing and sometimes that’s exactly what you need.


If you haven’t already start building a tribe of women around you who are focused, visionaries and great thinkers and you’ll be one step closer to winning at this life thing.

There is 1 comment

Add yours

Post a new comment