It is impossible to entirely rule out that feeling of jealousy in a relationship because humans have that natural tendency to be possessive. In small doses, a little jealous feeling can be proven to be healthy because it reminds the couples not to take each other for granted. It can encourage couples to appreciate each other and make a conscious effort to make sure each other feel valued.  However, there are times when there might be a need to check up on our feelings to ascertain if we have crossed the border lines.  If you notice a feeling of being an emotional threat, rage, grief, worry, envy, sadness, doubt, pain, and self-pity or fear, you may have crossed the limit especially if there are no evident reasons why you should feel insecure.

These feelings can be caused by the desire for intense possessiveness, poor self-image, unrealistic expectations in relationship and marriage, hurtful experiences of abandonment in the past or the desire to control. It is sometimes cited as a reason for abuse of partners or spouses.

Irrational jealousy strains relationships and marriages which could eventually lead to their destruction. It is an emotion just like every other human emotion but when it seems unhealthy, there is a huge need to tame it by;

Figuring out the root of your feeling

Don’t be quick to assume all the time. Make effort to ask questions so as to be clarified on the issue at stake. Are there reasons why you should feel insecure? Keep in mind that just these things may not be real; they may just be something you’ve perceived.

Being truthful to yourself

Tell yourself the truth about the fact that your irrational jealousy has a negative effect on your relationship. Awareness will enable you to accept that your jealousy is most likely unjustified and therefore easier to conquer. It is how you deal with your jealousy that dictates how the relationship will continue. Recognizing your irrationality towards normal situations will stand you in good stead to control your emotions.

Take positive and practical steps towards controlling your emotions

Positive and practical steps towards keeping your emotions in check include; Learning to communicate with your partner effectively, trust them especially if they have never been unfaithful in the past, If you find yourself struggling with self-esteem- you will need to work on it, try as much as possible not to intend to retaliate by making them jealous or allowing imagination to over-power reality.


What other ways do you think will help control irrational jealousy?


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