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Over the weekend, American – Trinidadian rapper Nicki Minaj took to Twitter to drop some sound advice to all of her fans. In these series of tweets, Nicki emphasised the importance of self-worth, being grounded spiritually and women empowering each other. Although, some of her followers saw this as a strategy used by Nicki to promote her upcoming album titled ‘Queen‘, there is no doubt that Nicki did spill some facts.

In one of her tweets, she wrote ‘ , know your worth. You were a Queen before him. You’ll be a Queen after him. He can’t make or break you. Being equally yoked is what you should strive for. Spirituality is key. Once your spirit can soar on its own, then you are ready to “allow” him the privilege of ur time.’ 

It is rather a coincidence that the themes highlighted in this tweet are prevailing issues faced in the society today; the issue of women knowing their worth and women settling for less.’ A woman who knows her worth is aware that she is fearfully and wonderfully made and that her value has been set far above rubies. A Woman of Worth is that woman with great value, beauty, confidence and she demonstrates that in all that she does.

It is mandatory for every woman to get to this level of self-realisation and only when this is achieved, we will then begin to experience healthy and fruitful relationships in every area of our lives. I had a friend who always wanted to get married before clocking 22 because she felt marriage was the solution to her problems and as a result of this, she experienced a lot of bad relationships. When she was about to get married, she said something that really struck me and kept me wondering if she was about to do the right thing. She said ‘at least his family have money so I will be fine’ so when I heard that the marriage crashed in less than a year I wasn’t too surprised. A woman of worth will never settle for the “at least kind of man” at least he is fine, at least he has money, at least he has a car, at least I will be married and people will respect me. 

Relationships were not created to complete us or make us whole because we were born complete rather, they’re meant to make us realize our innate wholeness. So instead of asking, “How can my partner complete me?” ask, “How can my partner help me realize my completeness?” And instead of asking, “How can my partner fulfil my needs?” ask, “How can my partner be a source of inspiration so I can heal myself?” The goal of a relationship is not to fill a missing void inside us; its purpose is to recognize that there isn’t a void, to begin with. Rather it meant for two people who realize their own completeness last far longer together than two people who seek completeness through each other.

Nobody has the power to break you, nobody knows you better than yourself so don’t hand over that power to anyone else. Grow at your own pace, discover new things about yourself, get deep with your spirituality, find peace within you and in the end let it be that man’s privilege to love, nurture and cherish you because you are a Queen.

Finally, let’s try this little game (wherever you see the word, ‘love’, replace it with the name of whomever you are in a relationship with and if it doesn’t sit right then something is wrong) ‘love is patient, love is kind. Love does not envy, love does not boast, love is not proud. Love does not dishonour others, love is not self-seeking, love is not easily angered, love keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

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